Making Progress
by Andorian Ice Princess-AIP
Summary: They had finally worked past the angst of Darden's death, but when Severide is a no show for what's supposed to be a fun night out for all of them, Casey's discovery helps them both to heal and continue to move forward. Casey/Severide Based on eppy 1.02 Mon Amor 'contains some spoilers'


**Title: Making Progress**

**Summary:** They had finally worked past the angst of Darden's death, but when Severide is a no show for what's supposed to be a fun night out for all of them, Casey's discovery helps them both to heal and continue to move forward. Casey/Severide Based on eppy 1.02 Mon Amor 'contains some spoilers'

**Disclaimer: ** Chicago Fire and its characters are the property of Dick Wolfe, NBC and….well sadly not me lol if so we'd have wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy more broments than we do now!

**A/N:** Not sure if you all noticed but the last one shot was mostly from Severide's POV and this one, this piece for the eppy that follows will be mostly Casey's POV to show the caring concern he has in return and what he was thinking and feeling in the eppy that followed. I hope you like it just as much.

_Note: "Words in italics and double quotes taken directly from episode"_

* * *

For the first time in weeks, Casey's sleep isn't at fitful and tormented as it had been; his mind always replaying Andy Darden's horrible death and then watching Severide's angry face accuse him of actually murdering his childhood friend.

_'Andy died because you were careless. You're a lousy fire fighter! You got a man killed on your watch! You're to blame…YOU!'_

And on it went so that he'd hear Darden calling to him for help before he'd wake up in a cold sweat, cursing his name, Kelly's name and his profession in general. Then his weary head would slump back onto the semi-damp pillow in a vain attempt to reclaim the night so he could wake up the next morning at least a little bit rested. The night before last, however, he had seen himself fall through the floor in the burning apartment and his whole body would shake. But it was Severide's concerned tone asking if he was alright that settled his mind a little and helped him get back to sleep for a few solid hours.

_I'm not to blame…Kelly doesn't blame me. It wasn't my fault…I'm not to blame. Not my fault._

Waking up the morning after they had spent most of the late afternoon and early evening talking in the bar, reconnecting as friends, making amends over their childish tantrums and just hanging as two buddies, was a delightful treat. Casey looks over at the clock and actually smiles at the time, realizing this day off would be spent resting as much as possible.

He didn't want to complain to Severide or come across as weak but his chest, back and ribs still hurt from the fall. His body gently groans as he gets out of bed, his mind already having a list of things to do before it was back to work in a few days. But unlike the last set of days off when all he had to look forward to at work from Severide was receiving more unfair accusations about Darden's death, this time he knows going back won't be as tense and they might even be civil toward each other around their respective teams.

So the morning of their first shift back, Casey expects to walk into the firehouse and at least be offered that genuine display of friendship they had started to regrow, continuing from where they left a few nights earlier. But as he rounds the corner into the locker room he locks eyes with Severide and suddenly a tight feeling starts to grow in his stomach. The conversation is short and somewhat strained; focusing on Heather's kids and nothing else. A few seconds of uncomfortable silence grows before Casey nods and goes about his business.

_Now what's going on with him? Do I press it or leave it for now? Maybe he still blames me? Maybe it's something else? Would he tell me? Leave it…maybe he just had a bad night. _

He chalks it up to Severide's sometimes bullheaded attitude, shrugs it off and tells himself that he'll be back to his insufferable self in a few days and not to worry about it. He could press but the tight expression on Severide's face signals him to back down and that's what he does. _He'll be okay. Maybe his days off weren't as productive as he wanted, _Casey reasons. _He'll be fine tomorrow. _But events were about to transpire that would put a major dent in his reasoning.

The call to the top of the collapsed construction site wasn't that out of the ordinary and Casey was giving his team instructions like he normally would. But it's not until they both look down the hole at the trapped man 'Peter' and Severide tells him that _"he's going down," _that his anxiety surges.

_"It's unstable," Casey argues back as he looks at Severide with a soft plead behind his warm blue sapphires; hoping that he could at least remind him that risking his life before they had secured the site was crazy. The soft plea lands on deaf ears as Severide presses ahead with his own agenda._

_"Aren't we all," Severide grins as he gives Casey a playful slap and readies himself to go down into the unstable hole._

As much as he wants to pull Severide back or get Boden to pull rank and keep him out of that hole he knows he can't so he humbly submits and tells himself to support Severide no matter what. But each time the building shifts beneath his feet his panic courses and he pops his head back down into the hole to see what was going on – worried for the injured man but praying the building holds long enough for Severide to get back up in one piece.

_"Severide! We need to pull back! It's gonna give!" Casey calls down into the hole after the shifting had stopped._

But he could only curse his friend's stubbornness when he makes no attempt to come up the hole until he's ready. He knows if the situation was reversed that Severide would put him in a fireman's carry if he had to to make sure he'd listen and get out of the hole. _Damn it Kelly get out of that hole right now! _Casey's mind growls as he looks back down.

"Kelly!"

"Matt, just get me that damn surgeon!" Severide barks.

Casey looks at Severide's back, unable to actually see what he's doing and his mind racing as to what else he could say to get his friend back up the hole at his side. But the prayer he offered earlier would only be partly answered as when Severide slowly climbs back up the makeshift ladder; his somber expression and tormented words tell Casey most of what he needs to know.

_"It's a recovery operation now," Severide mentions with a glum tone as he locks eyes with Casey for a few seconds before he turns and heads for the ladder to get up to the top level. _

Casey follows at a discreet distance, coming to the top of the ladder just in time to see Severide drop his bloody gloves to the ground. Casey looks up at Boden before he nears the gloves and gets an intense glare from Boden but no protest to picking up the gloves.

"Kelly!" Casey calls out as he hurries after Severide with the gloves still dangling in his right hand. "Hey, wait up!" Casey calls once more, Severide hearing the second begging request just before he reaches his truck and stops; his back still to Casey as he nears.

"I'm okay," Severide lightly hisses, not turning around.

"Want a second opinion?" Casey asks tenderly. But just as the words to his question roll off his lips, he notices Severide's face gently wince and his jaw tighten._ That's not stress…that's pain. Did he get hurt? Was that perhaps his blood? _"Who's blood is this?" Casey demands as Severide turns around in shock.

"What? That was Peters…he's dead Casey," Severide growls, using Casey's last name to show his verbal displeasure for being cornered.

"That wince was pretty heavy," Casey doesn't back down; Severide's expression slightly softening but still remaining firm.

"Back off Casey!" Severide glares at him before it's Casey's face that morphs into innocent wonder and he can only sigh and let his frame deflate a little.

"I'm worried. You were down there a long time," Casey tries to explain. "And this is fresh blood. Were you hurt?"

"No. That's not my blood. It's Peters and…I'm okay."

"Kelly…"

"Matt I just watched a guy die right before me, while I sat by and just watched! Yeah we've seen it before but…you know what? I'm fine and this is over now. Just toss those into the trash when you're done with them," Severide finishes with a brief snarl before he turns and heads for the back of his truck.

_Damn why did I push him so hard, _Casey's mind berates himself as he remains fixed in place for a few seconds longer.

"He'll be okay," Boden's hand rests on Casey's shoulder and gives it a friendly pat before he carries on to his own vehicle. Casey watches Severide a few moments longer before he gives his head a small shake, tosses the gloves and climbs into the front of his own truck.

What Severide said was true, in their profession they had seen people of all ages die unfairly before their eyes so he knows that it's something more than merely losing Peter in the hole that is bothering Severide. But to corner his friend and try to pin him down for an answer would be like trying to cage a restless tiger and he'd come out on the losing end of that battle.

The large trucks pull into the bay and Casey gets out, watching Severide pull away from the teams and storm off alone – again. _I'm going to put an end to this right now, _Casey's mind states in concern as he follows after Severide. But just as he rounds the corner he watches Severide pull his phone and get started on a conversation that sounds personal, so he pulls back and turns and heads back to the truck area where Hermann and his clan were entertaining the two teams.

But the dark mood of the day was to continue with the official assessment of what killed Andy Darden. Casey's eyes nervously flit between Severide at his side and the board in the front of the room. Severide doesn't meet his gaze as they stand in the back of the room a few feet apart, while the explanation into the death of their friend is explained to the teams. _Oh damn…here it comes…_Casey's mind huffs as it's told to the whole group that had squad 3 made a bigger vent in the back of the house, Andy Darden would still be alive.

"Damn it."

Casey hears the small curse under Severide's lips as he passes closer than expected, forcing Casey to slightly flinch and pull back but remain in place; the discussion wasn't over and they weren't dismissed. _Don't go…just let him blow it off…_Casey's mind tells him. And as tough as it is to just let Severide go off and stew in his frustrated anger, he knows that Severide would only toss back that he was right but Andy was still dead and that was it. So with a small curse of his own, he remains leaning against the wall while the rest of the tormented scenario about Darden's death is explained in detail.

After a small eternity, Casey is finally able to pull away from the wall he's been supporting for the past hour, escaping into the hallway and hurrying to find Severide; wanting to make peace and keep whatever remains of their friendship intact.

"Ah damn," Casey lightly curses as his fist rests on Severide's empty locker; his mind now torn if he should call him just to see if he was okay or let it go. _Let today come to an end…he watched one person die and then was basically told in front of a room full of people that he was partly responsible for his childhood friend's death. He's angry and bitter and just needs some time to cool down as you would._

Casey heads for his own locker, grabs his jacket and heads for the back exit doors; his mind reminding him that he had some construction work to do before the annual barbeque. _He'll be okay…in a few days he'll be okay… _Casey's mind chants over and over as he heads for his truck and then finally for home.

Much to Casey's dismay, Severide keeps his distance at the barbeque. He witnesses a small moment between Heather and Kelly and hopes it's as pleasant or at least friendly as Heather is toward him; his mind not knowing that his reasoning is furthest from the truth. The next time he looks for Severide – he's gone. _What the hell is going on? _Casey's mind huffs as he heads toward Chief Boden.

"Chief, Kelly leave already?"

"Said he had something personal to tend to," Boden replies simply; his tone not offering any other details for Casey to further press for.

"Think it has something to do with what was said about Darden's death?"

"Kelly doesn't like his faults to come to bear," Boden answers as he turns and looks at Casey with a tight smile. "But then none of us do, do we?"

"No," Casey is forced to agree as he sees Hallie waving to him. "Thanks Chief."

"Sure," Boden tells Casey as he takes his leave.

As much as he tries to tell himself to just relax and enjoy the rest of the annual picnic, he can't; his mind keeps replaying Severide's heavy wince and utterly helpless expression upon seeing the bloody gloves in Casey's grasp a few days ago. And for the rest of the picnic, he can only offer a strained smile and hope the afternoon passes quickly.

XXXXXXXX

He and Hallie arrive at Buzzards, his eyes quickly taking stock of everyone there; noticing all the smiling faces looking back at him except one – Severide was missing. _Damn what is going on with him? _"I have to leave for a bit. Get a ride home with Cruz?"

"Sure, what's going on?" Hallie asks in concern.

"It's Kelly and I don't know," Casey replies as they stand in a private corner talking. "Maybe I'm being overly paranoid but he hasn't been himself since that cave-in and I'm worried," Casey confides in his fiancé. "I've tried calling in the past few days since the picnic, but he won't answer or return my calls. I thought we had made some progress a few nights back but maybe not."

"Go and find him."

"You sure?"

"Otherwise you know you'll be here but not really be here. I know you're worried. When you told me that you two finally reconnected after a month of tension and bickering and strained pot shots at each other I was happy. I know how much his friendship means to you. If he's hurting he might want help but not ask for it."

"How can you be sure?"

"Because you'd do that," Hallie retorts lightly. "Go and find Kelly. Make sure he's okay and get your friendship back on track or you'll drive me crazy."

Casey gives her a warm peck on the cheek before he heads for the back door, pulling his phone and trying Severide's number once more. "Damn where are you?" He asks before he does something he'd only do as a last resort – put a trace on his cell and at least find out the area he's at.

As he nears the strange house, his mind starts to chastise himself for interrupting what could be an actual date. _What am I doing here? He's going to kick your ass for being this paranoid, _Casey's mind huffs as he pulls up a few car lengths and stops. He turns back and watches as the front door opens and Severide appears – with an old woman in the front door.

"His mother? Grand mother? Damn Casey why are you snooping," Casey grumbles to himself as he prepares to start his truck and head back to Buzzards. But just before his key can turn the ignition, he notices Severide slightly falter as he reaches the front gate, before he drops to his knees and cradles his head.

"Not good," Casey whispers as he gets out of his truck and hurries toward Severide's hunched over frame. "Kelly!" Casey exclaims in concern.

"Matt!" Severide hisses as he looks up and then quickly dries his eyes. "What the hell…are you…doing here?"

"Hey you okay?" Casey reaches in, wanting to take an arm and help get him up.

"Get away! Damn I'm fine!" Severide growls as he pushes Casey away.

Casey notices the tears in Severide's eyes as Severide straightens up and looks at him in anger.

"How did you find me?"

"What's going on?" Casey asks firmly as he leans in once more.

"I said…leave me alone," Severide pushes Casey's hand away before he turns and storms toward his car; Casey following at a discreet distance. Just before he reaches the passenger side, he stops; his back still to Casey.

"Look I'm not…was that your mother?"

"My wh…" Severide's lips offer a slightly nervous chuckle as he turns around and gazes upon Casey's innocent wonder. "No. It wasn't my mother and before you ask it wasn't a date either."

"I just want to make sure you're okay. You haven't been yourself since that morning of the cave-in. And then with the finding's on Darden's death…you've pulled away from even just talking as friends and I'm worried. I thought the other night we had come to a new agreement…just to get back on track. Now it feels like we're at square one again. Kelly…what's going on?"

"That was Georgie and she…" Severide pauses as he pulls out his phone, taking a few steps to close the gap between him and Casey. "Peter was her husband and just before he died, he recorded this on his phone. I've been trying to get a hold of Georgie for the past few days and finally could see her tonight. I just played it but um…I made a copy…as a reminder that…damn it Matt he was a good man and the last person he spent his last moments on this earth with was me."

"At least he wasn't alone," Casey mentions softly as his fingers press the stop button on the phone. "I don't need to hear the words to know how much they mean to you. I'm sure she was happy that he wasn't alone also. No one wants to face death alone. You never left him Kelly."

"He begged me to save his life," Severide slightly sniffles as he wipes his face and looks away. "I failed him Matt. I let a good man die and he…ah everything is so messed up," he growls as he pulls away and heads for the front door.

"I should have been down in that hole with you."

"Wouldn't have let you," Severide shakes his head as Casey looks at him in amusement before he snickers. "That's funny?"

"I told myself that you wouldn't have let me go down into that hole."

"Feel better? Now can we just call it a night?"

"You shouldn't drive right now," Casey tries to pull him back.

"Get away!" Severide hisses as he turns and gives Casey a good shove. Casey's footing slightly falters but he's able to quickly counter and ensure he doesn't fall flat on his butt. "Matt…damn I'm sorry. Look I just need to be alone right now."

"Maybe you shouldn't be," Casey gently suggests as Severide looks at him with a heavy frown as he straightens back up.

"You okay?" Severide asks in concerned remorse.

"Yeah I'm fine," Casey assures him.

"Heather blames me for Andy's death."

"Kelly, I know for a fac…"

"Don't…please don't," Severide insists in haste. "She told me that if it wasn't for me, Andy would still be alive."

"Andy didn't listen to me."

"I know. I just…I should have vented better…ah damn it Matt."

"Want me to talk to her?"

"No. We need to work this through. But hearing it in the debrief the other day. The same day I recorded this…" Severide looks down at his phone and huffs. "It was almost too much."

"Why didn't you say anything about all this sooner?"

"So you could say I told you so?" Severide tosses back with a bitter tone as Casey's brow furrows. "Matt…that wasn't fair."

"Andy was both our friend's, saying that would be…it would be wrong and unfair to you and I never would. Hearing it said to all of us and having to relive that moment again, wasn't easy for me either okay?"

"You weren't in charge of the bottom floor vent," Severide replies with a small hiss. "Look I just…"

"Is that why you were so insistent about going down into that hole?" Casey chances.

"Matt…"

"I know you're reckless at times but this was pushing it even for you. It was an unstable environment and that whole damn roof could have caved in on top of you. Was it to prove a point? It's just us right now. Was that the real reason?"

"Yes, okay? Yes! But to myself," Severide growls in exasperation as he turns away. "It was to myself. I just had…I don't know why okay but I just had to do it. I just did. Matt I'm sorry I'm not good company tonight. I didn't want to go to Buzzards because Georgie was available tonight. Watching that with her again…it ripped me apart. I don't know why I risked it but I'm glad I did. I know this will haunt me for a long time but maybe it's what I deserve. Goodnight."

"You wanna grab a beer?" Casey asks suddenly.

"What? No. Go back to Buzzards and just…not tonight."

"Come on, don't make me beg," Casey tosses lightly as Severide's lips offer a small smirk.

"Yeah…that begging face. No one's immune to that face you know."

"Oh not this again," Casey lightly groans as Severide's lips finally offer a nervous chuckle. "Come on. I need a beer."

"You don't give up do you?"

"Ah you know you love that about me," Casey offers a friendly smile. "Look I know the past few days have been tough and have…let's just say it. They sucked. And I know you like to pull away because you told me that but after reliving that moment again you shouldn't be alone tonight. Let's go for a beer and just…whatever."

"Yeah I guess this round's on you right?"

"My offer…my buy," Casey gestures toward his waiting truck. "I'll drive."

Just as they near the truck, Severide looks over as Casey offers a small stretch and wince.

"What was that?"

"What?"

"That wince. You still hurting since the fall?"

"No. Getting old," Casey retorts with an uneasy nod.

"Liar. That fall did more damage that you let on, didn't it?" Severide looks at Casey in concern.

"This night is about you not me," Casey reminds him in haste.

"It did right?"

"What's your motto? Take a lickin' and keep on tickin'…"

"Matt…"

"Trust me Kelly I'm fine," Casey replies, his mind settling at the friendly use of their first names once again. "But I wasn't the only one wincing the last shift either was I?" Casey tosses back seriously. "In fact, that's the same wince you've been offering for a few weeks now."

"I'm fine."

"Now you see where I get it from," Casey grins as Severide purses his lips and shakes his head. "Monkey see monkey do?"

"Monkey huh?"

"You always call me your little brother so that's what we do right? Play monkey and copy our older siblings?"

"Monkey's gonna give you a noggie for that," Severide playfully threatens as Casey pulls out of reach and chuckles as he finally heads for the driver's side and gets in, Severide slumping into the front passenger seat.

"You hurt your arm didn't you?"

"The day Andy died," Severide whispers in misery as he looks over at Casey. "I've got it covered. Really, I'm okay. I just…tonight everything hurts," he confesses softly.

"Fair enough," Casey nods as he starts up his truck and pulls away, heading for a quieter place to have a drink and just – talk. "Noogie?" Casey looks over at Severide with a wry glance.

"It's still coming little monkey," Severide teases as Casey nods and grins. As they continue to talk about the events of the past few days; Severide telling Casey more about what Peter's last words were the tension starts to dissipate. As they near their intended destination, Casey's mind takes comfort in the fact that his persistence was paying off – the strain between him and Severide, while it wasn't gone for good just yet it was slowly dissolving and that to him was the progress he had been hoping for when he decided to push for the truth in the first place. He had pushed but this time Severide hadn't pushed him away - that was progress. They had been friends for years and so to take a step backward after they had tried to move forward a few nights ago to him was unacceptable. A close friendship and strong brotherly bond was something worth fighting to maintain. And while progress might at times be slow and painful, if it's always moving forward, its guaranteed success in the long run.

**THE END!**

* * *

**A/N:** Okay so a little insight into Casey pressing Severide for further details about what he was dealing with and of course going after him when he was the only one that didn't show up to just hang out and enjoy the company. Hope you all liked this and please do review before you go and thanks so much!

**PS:** hope you are all liked the last update to Stranger in my House – that one will update next. (does Kelly have reason to go after Matt? Hope you're ready to find out next!)


End file.
